In an effort to raise awareness for the Union’s educational
‘Shag Week’, Officers have promised that we don’t have to
wear protection this weekend if we engage with their posts on
Instagram. “You don’t have to wear a condom if you liked our
posts about Shag Week.”
As part of Shag Week at Keele University on Monday,
Officers shared important information for students on the
subject of sexual health and safety. We have learned that
consent is forever relevant in conversations about sex on
campus and is described as “An emphatic and very clear yes,
freely given with no ambiguity, revocable during any stage…
and [based upon] Strong verbal and physical communication.”
The Officers go on to talk about anatomy, sharing some ‘Sexy
Science Facts’ – Did you know that women are capable of three
kinds of orgasm, and can achieve up to 20 orgasms in a row?
Shag Week included exciting workshops, a quiz by our
LGBTQ+ Society, as well as various carnival games and even a
scavenger hunt. Every day this week at 1PM, students were
also encouraged to ‘find the clit’ hidden somewhere on
campus for a prize, proving once and for all that it’s real.
Officers announced that anyone who likes and
comments on Shag Week posts will be allowed to forsake their
prophylactic sheaths on Saturday and Sunday, so long as we’re
all really careful.
“Students have paid diligent attention to our efforts
this week to strike up meaningful conversations about sexual
health, with many burning questions asked, though many of
those questions were about burning feelings down there,”
Said the Union Officer.
“We believe that students should be rewarded for their
participation and seriousness in discussions about sex, so
we’re going to let them go raw for a bit, as a treat.”
The moratorium on contraceptives ends at midnight on
Sunday, however it has been claimed that those who share
information about Shag Week with their friends via social
media will receive an extra 24 hours.
The Editor would like to note that the Shallot is not
legally responsible for any unwanted pregnancies caused by
this article. For more on Shag Week at Keele, follow
@keele_su_officers on Instagram.
